Day 219

First thing I did this morning was sit down and start writing out a grocery list so I can make some tasty dinners next week. A) It's high time I posted some pictures and B) my Mom is about to be out of town for a month and I have to have a plan in place so that my Dad and I don't end up at Chick-fil-a every night. I'll tell you what, it sure is nice to have a place to stay while I get my future worked out, but it is a whole lot harder to be responsible and stick to a routine when I'm at the parent's house. Part of it, of course, is the fact that I'm essentially on vacation, at least from school. I've been doing well enough with eating, but exercise is a struggle. Not that that is anything new.

I weighed in yesterday and hadn't lost anything (though when I weighed in on Wednesday I was down a pound, so maybe the scale was fibbing yesterday, lol?), so I've jumped back onto counting calories. At least, until we ate out for dinner and I had a margarita, which I'm pretty sure put me over my count. Yikes! So I'm going to need to get that under control. I have an app on my phone now that I can track my calories on, which makes things much more convenient, so I have no excuse!

And exercise. I've been doing ab workouts, but I know that's going to get boring real fast. The toe is pretty much healed, so I have more options now. I might just have to strap a water bottle on my leg and brave the heat for walks, as walking is really my favorite way to exercise. On the days I work mornings I can probably walk to the daycare, provided the temperature is reasonable...last thing I want to do is show up sweaty for work. Ick. Whatever I do, I simply cannot sit on my tush all summer! Totally unacceptable, obviously. Must get some strategies in place.

But I have been following plenty of good habits, too...like completely avoiding the cookies, cupcakes, bagels, candy, you name it that have been in the kitchen at work over the last two weeks. Between birthdays, graduating preschoolers, and general showers of unhealthy food, there have been a lot of high-cal goodies under my nose at work lately, and I've passed them up with surprisingly little trouble. It's so great to feel like I have control over that! In the past, I not only would have gotten a cookie or cupcake, it would have been on my mind pretty much all day, and every time I went into the kitchen to do something, I would have swiped a little bite. Not anymore! Seriously, all that junk has had very little appeal to me lately. Why mess up a good thing, right?

So anyways. I've got recipes in line and I'm getting ready to head to the grocery! Need to print out coupons first, though. All that fresh stuff gets expensive!

You guys are awesome sauce! Thanks for rooting for me, and I'll be back with (hopefully good) news shortly!

Day 166

So I finally dragged my lazy butt over here to post! I don't know what's been up with me the last couple of days...I haven't been as motivated for some reason. I fell of the wagon a little this weekend and made a dessert. I don't know why I did it. Part of it was because I was home alone (Karlee went home for the weekend) and bored, I guess, and I hadn't had my pills so I was especially powerless against the munchies. But I wasn't sad or otherwise emotionally compromised...my dad was in Athens and we had just had a nice visit.

Going back and analyzing everything, I think a lot of why I caved to the need for chocolate was because I just got wrapped up in the "It's the weekend, I've got the place to myself, I don't have homework, so I'm just going to hang out in my PJs and play computer games and enjoy our weekend sample of Starz" thing. I also think that maybe I was a little lonely, having spent the past few weekends with friends and the fam...so maybe it was a little shock to my system to be left on my lonesome with Gus.

Whatever the reason, I decided I wanted chocolate, and I had a deadly combination of ingredients in my pantry: flour, eggs, sugar, butter, and cocoa. All you need for a wickedly delicious fudge-y pie/cake.

The good news is that I halved the recipe. Then, upon regaining my senses a little bit, I served myself a sensibly sized slice and dumped the rest in the trash before I had the chance to eat it. So that, at least, was a triumph.

I guess it just goes to show that one is never cured of food addiction. Luckily, I didn't "get drunk"or go on a binge. I think I've definitely learned how to have more control over my eating. But it still felt pretty bad, after I had done it, like I had committed a major diet crime.

So I had to talk myself through it and reassure myself that I had merely stumbled, not fallen. One slice of chocolate pie/cake was not going to ruin me! The important thing was that I threw it away and snapped back to good habits the next day.

I didn't want to talk about it on the blog, though. But I knew from the get-go that it was important that I share my boo-boo with everyone rather than pretend it didn't happen. Posting about it has made me realize that, in the grand scheme of things, one bad weekend will not ruin me. Bad days will come. As long as I can let those bad days go and move on with getting healthy, we're good! But I'm glad I'm putting it out there, instead of letting it simmer on my conscience for the next two weeks. The shame and the sneaky mindset I often have towards eating is what fuels a lot of my problems, so I'm determined to nix it!

So I got back on track today by getting out for my walk. It was a beautiful, if a little chilly, day, and I savored it, knowing that it will probably be the last day below 80 until October. I also cooked yesterday and today, and made some super yummy meals! I've enjoyed recipes from Steamy Kitchen for the past couple of days. Monday I made Chicken Sausage with Apple Slaw, which was great! I bought Trader Joe's Andouille chicken sausage, which was spicy and delicious. Here's a picture:

Then tonight I made Chicken Caprese, with a simple greens and avocado salad on the side. Yum!

We're getting back on track. One step at a time. I weighed in last Friday and was only down .2 pounds, and I'm not hopeful for this Friday, considering that this week will mainly be damage control. But I'll get it together! Forward ho!

BTW, does anyone on here use Twitter? It's something I've been meaning to figure out for a long time, and I thought it might be a useful supplement to the blog. Thoughts?